Hi my dear friends,
First of all, I want to express my most sincere wishes and a Happy New Year to you all and your families.
I know this should be in another section so Brian, please feel free to move it if you feel like it, but I posted it here because some members have contacted me and I want to reach most of them. Not sure they all go to the Izakaya.
Then I guess I owe you guys an explanation and an apology for my silence those past few months. I’ve wanted to do that for quite some time but it isn’t always easy to expose your issues in front of everyone, and I know some of you may find those issues triffle or first world problems.
Anyway, here’s what has happened to me since my absence.
First of all, let me tell you that I’m an animal lover… maybe a little too much ! For years, I have been doing the job of a shelter for distressed cats without help or financing. At some point, I had more than 30 cats. Costly and tiring. That’s roughly three hours of work in addition to my full time job everyday. Those animals I recover are usually starving, some of them sick, all of them scared by very difficult beginnings. I’m used to have animals that don’t live long because of that. I loose some every year. Everytime, its a tragedy for me but I’ve developped some endurance to it.
This year was special.
I lost ten of them in a row over the space of two months. Causes of death were different but I think that the last straw was probably the last one who was litteraly and voluntarily crushed to pulp by a car and the driver purposefully drove over him with both wheels. I know it as I saw it happen.
I guess it taxed me a lot and I entered some kind of a breakdown. I was starting to recover, in September, when the secong blow came.
Now, here’s the second part of my life. Ten years ago, my elderly mother suffered a stroke that left her with paralysis on her left side. My father had a hard life working in construction and carrying loads so his back is ruined and he has to use a walker. Being an only child, I took them both in and care for them. Not a light job either, but one I feel I have a duty to accomplish.
So, come September, my father has to be hospitalized because he had fallen in the middle of the night. His blood count was well below normal. Diagnosis : Mielodisplastic syndrome. To sum up, a bone marrow cancer that will turn into fatal leukemla in generally something like two years. That was the fatal and final blow to me.
Now it’s been three months since that diagnosis and I am starting to digest it and recover. My father is responding to treatment and so far, he is neither better nor worse.
There you have it !
All tis has made me depressed and apathetic, with no real interest for anything and some sort of self pitying.
So I am sorry and apologize to all those who’ve contacted me and to whom I haven’t replied, I will reply to each and everyone of you. Please just give me some time as things have accumulated and I have some catching up to do.
Know that I am feeling better and will do my best to stay around.
Best wishes to you all,